Things I Never Thought I'd...

I’ve been in a lot of interesting situations in my lifetime but  I was thinking the other day that there are a lot of things I never thought I would ever say or write. There are things like:

“I’ll be working late tonight, we’re breaking in a new dolphin at the oceanarium”, or...

“Oh crap! We’re on the wrong train! This one goes to Russia”! How about…

”Um….no honey, those people are just pretending to crucify that man” (they were NOT pretending, Good Friday can get a little graphic in the Philippines).  

I never thought I’d write a book about how we fled the Philippines on a ship to escape the wrath of an erupting volcano and violent earthquakes.

How about, ‘Chi, please don’t dump the cup of poisonous snakes on the kitchen table”! or...

“Colt! Leave the monkey alone and don’t give him any more bananas”! (We were in our back yard)

Maybe..."Samantha, no one is shooting at you". (Someone WAS shooting at them)

There have been loads of things over the years. I’ll bet each of us has been in situations we never quite expected to be in. I know we have definitely hit the jackpot here in Dhaka. I really want this to be an interactive blog, so when I post the link on facebook, I’d like to hear about what you never expected to talk or write about.

So, I’ll go first to get things started.

Here is my list of 25 things I never thought I’d hear myself say or write before Dhaka…

1.      “Derek, do you know where the Turkish Embassy is? I have to stop by there this afternoon”.

2.      (To a rickshaw driver) – “Why are all the cars coming towards us?? Aren’t we meant to be on the other side of the street”??!!

3.      “I figured it out, the car will cost a million, eight hundred and fifty thousand taka”.

4.      “What time should we have the chauffeur come in the morning”?

5.      “What day is your meeting with the embassador?”

6.      “Seriously? 1,200 taka ($15.00) for a string of salt water pearls? That’s too much”!

7.      “Shut the drapes. I don’t feel like watching the cyclone”.

8.      “I wish today wasn’t the maids day off. Now I’LL have to do the dishes!”

9.      “I’ll just take a rickshaw to the embassy”.

10.   “Have you booked the tickets to India yet”?

11.   “Did you know we live across the street from The High Commission of Maldives? Um…Where are the Maldives?”

12.   “Honey, can you bring the extension ladder over here so I can get the peanut butter out of the cupboard”?

13.   “The power in the apartment went out 37 times today but the generator kicked on so that was good! How was your day”?

14.   “Driver, do you know how to get to the ambassador’s house”?

15.   “Did any buses get fire bombed today”?

16.   “Don’t forget to keep the mosquito net closed. It’s dengue fever season”.

17.   “Remember when mosquito nets seemed romantic”?

18.   “What time will the physical therapist come by the house”? (we don’t go to him. He comes to us).

19.   “I have a masseuse coming by at 4:00 today”.

20.   “Why is your business card in Bangla?”

21.   “Oh, so that’s what Hester looks like in sanscrit”.

22.   “Have they taken down the blockades yet”?

23.   “I told the rickshaw driver not to go past Khaleda Zia’s house! The press were crawling all over the place”!

24.   “Everyone is going to Nepal for spring break. I wish we could go too”!

25.   “I like this car best. It has a big back seat”.

You get the idea. Those are all actual phrases, questions or emails that we have found ourselves saying or writing.

Now let’s hear what you have to say. You can post on the blog or on facebook!